Papaz song

Yo back in the day, lived a little kid stray
my mama would raise me, my pops would discipline me
I made so many mistakes in the past
I say its the last
Im disapointin’ to him like the the rest
their all locked away cause of sass
I resemble Uncle Ray well thats wat he would say
I say and do what I want to see if I can get away
why is it me God, why do I portray
Im left sayin’ a pare God has nothin’ ta say
I know he’s done his best to provide
when I see him its like tv and its live
he was neva around
at least I didn’t feel like he was?
he would be alone writin’ music
hopin’ he could send me out in the wild to be majestic
but arrested in what he wished I would neva’ become
Im tryin’ ta be what he wants but now im so wrong
Messed in the head and all these threats
im screwin’ up his life gettin sued and puttin’ him in debt
Deep down I thought I had his respect
no matter what he said I tried to understand his aspect
When he said he hated me it hurt so bad
I just tried to forgive and forget but again its my dad
I felt so said but I walked away like it never happened
my sister was hopin’ the police would just catch him
He tried to make his life so perfect
fool you’ve done nothin’ ta change
when you think you have it didn’t work
I! was the one left to hurt
you live your life with one little smirk
jerk I hope you rot in the dirt of the earth
All this pain inside, do you despise
you say you cry, you don’t feel no emotion
doesn’t occur to you about my feelings
It’s dwelling and

You always did your best to protect
thanks you for that
I tried to hold my rage in as best I can
but damn man now I cant hold it in
remember when mom started drinkin’ afta’ the divorce
car crashes, police came and used lethal force
I came to live with you dad that was my choice
you were better to live with than that situation
you kept threatenin to send me back
you thought I didn’t like it, I showed disrespect
well I accepted the lectures that I shall get
only thing I regret is thinkin’ you could teach me
how to be a man
all you taught me
is how to hate the world
I don’t share my feelings cause I could
when I want to I hear you callin’ me a word in the background
I’ve found to keep my thoughts to myself
no matter what my opinion was it was neva’ felt
so I had to delt with my problems on my own
it’s draggin’ me through a grave yard and signin’ off my tombstone
even when I can I wont
cause its a big don’t in my world
but after all those year
I felt like blood and sweat were never shed
So I made a big mistake and you got so mad
you said illegal things and promised a jab
you couldn’t hold back your rage
you need to be locked away
what the hell you call yourself a dad
you promised to send me back to mom and not look back
i hope you burn in hell
I wish somehow I could torture you myself

I couldn’t stand puttin’ down my own father for nothin’
this is somethin’
so big it could change if I love em
or bother with em
I don’t wanna be like you
so stop saying back in the day
“I easily tricked my mom
went places and got away”
If I was like you I’d be a fat lazy punk
who thinks he can take on anyone
You don’t even get the mental game of it
you only know the physical but legit
you don’t know what it’s like to wanna commit suicide
when it’s just not enough to sit and cry
so why do you think that you know me
how do you win all of these arguments
I would step into hell bow to the devil
decent to the abyss, death at high risk
you wouldn’t even change for your son
worship for your daughter
you loved Janice more than us
so tell me f’ up is that smarter
this is the part where I say
after all of those years you were there
but afta what you you put me through
who the hell cares
and if I see you after I leave
I would want you to stay away from me
I know you did your best, but accept
that your only son in world ain’t commin’ back
and I ain’t sorry